The Qualities of Mindful Awareness are:
- Kindness (to self and others)
- Self-Compassion (and Compassion for others.)
- Self-acceptance
- Less critical judgement (of self and others)
- Wise Discernment (which leads to Wise Action)
- Gentleness
- Curiosity
- Patience
- Grounded-ness
- Less reactivity
- A non-verbal, even non-conceptual sense, or feeling of wholeness, insight, peace
In I.F.S. therapy, Richard Schwartz calls similar Qualities: “The Qualities of Self”. In Mindful psychotherapy, I call them: “The Qualities of Awareness”.
When you practice Mindfulness, one of the first things you begin to notice is that your awareness starts to feel different than your “ordinary, everyday” awareness.
What does this mean? The terms “awareness” and “attention” are sometimes used interchangeably in Mindfulness, meditation, and body-mind language in general. For the purposes of the work I do, I am going to make a distinction:
Attention is the ability to focus on one thing (the focus of your choice) at a time. In Mindfulness, you are shown how to place your attention on, for example, your breath, or a body sensation, and return to this focus in a relaxed way, when you notice that are distracted. In meditation, this is called a concentration practice. Just concentration in itself leads to relaxation and, at the same time, the ability to gently focus.
Over time, placing your attention on one thing, and learning to return in this focus in a gentle, non-judgmental way when external or internal distractions occur, creates a sense of more Sustained Attention.
This sustained attention, even if just for a few moments at first, gradually develops into a deeper sense of relaxed focus, which has many benefits: calmness and even a sense of peacefulness begin to occur. Sustained attention begins to develop into a sense of Awareness. We become aware of what we are focusing on: the breath, body sensations and at some point, emotions and thoughts, as well.
Additionally, over time, we becomes aware of the feeling states that awareness itself brings about. We begin to feel the awareness that we are bringing to our object of focus, as well as the object (i.e. the breath, body sensations, etc.) This can feel like quietness, or stillness and, over time, gives birth to others felt states as well.
This quiet, or still state is often referred to as: Awareness, or Presence. Awareness has certain universal “felt states” that have certain “hallmarks”, or Qualities. In practicing Mindfulness, we find that these qualities are both inherent and can also be nurtured and developed in throughout our lives.
In the calm state of Awareness, we begin feel and contact these qualities. In this process there is often there is a sense of discovery, as if these qualities were always there, but we didn’t recognize them. Often we don’t initially have faith in our ability to feel them. In many cases, especially in severe psychological stress, pain, or trauma, these qualities are covered over with so many layers of negative, painful experiences that it feels difficult to believe that we could access these states at all.
In Buddhist practices, there are many Contemplative-based meditations that help people suffering from wounding experiences to build, develop, cultivate, nurture and enhance these qualities. These Contemplative-based Practices greatly support and enhance the innate qualities, as well as build the internal resources needed to live a more balanced, fulfilling and happy life.
In my groups and individual therapy, I will guide and assist you in both building and accessing these Qualities. This builds a foundation of internal safety, from which trauma work and therapy work in general can grow.